Divine Arsenal: Dual Weapon Cultivation Read online

  As soon as I’d asked the question, I realized that it wasn’t entirely true, at least from the myths I’d read about. Greeks had demigods, right?

  Eliezer chuckled and shook his head. “The first and most basic truth,” he said, like he was quoting from a book. “You must accept that you know only know one thing—that you know nothing! Gaze upon the brilliance that is the Peak Supreme God!”

  Eliezer raised his hands, and a stream of purple lightning danced between them. His eyes became great thunderbolts, like some weird approximation of Zeus. Energy pulsed around him, his robes swishing and his long mustaches swaying about his face. With a sudden whoomph of power, the old man’s robes burned a dazzling white, so bright that I had to shield my eyes.

  From beside me, I heard Anna let out an awed gasp.

  Unlike her, I had to force myself not to cower before this being who’d brought us into his strange world. Now, without a sliver of a doubt, I realized that Eliezer was who he said he was. Exactly what that was, I didn’t know, but he was obviously a powerful being from some pantheon I’d never heard of.

  And if there was one thing I’d learned from pop culture, it was that messing with divine beings often led to a whole lot of trouble. They always had an angle. They’d grant you power in exchange for your eternal soul, or they’d give you some gift that turned out to actually be a curse, just to entertain themselves.

  I shook my head to put aside these thoughts and focus on the only thing that mattered: getting Anna and me out of here.

  “I know this place isn’t just some tent at the fairgrounds,” I said, taking a step backward. “I want out of this place, old man!”

  “Hey, Eric?” Anna swayed on a heel, nearly stumbling right off the platform. I shuddered to think what might have happened to her if she’d lost her footing and fell into outer space. “Where’s that tent flap we came through? I think I might just let you finish up with the old guy and get another drink…”

  “Stay right there,” I growled, putting a hand on Anna’s shoulder. It wouldn’t do for her to leave—not when every direction led to...to what, exactly? Certainly not the Chesterton County Fair.

  “I wish to have a beneficiary,” Eliezer said simply. “A chosen subject to grant powers. Someone who can reach the same heights that I have achieved, give an old man some company in his dotage. Perhaps even surpass me, one of these days…”

  There it was. The bargain. Power in exchange for...what? Someone to keep an old man company? Was Eliezer one of those geriatrics who hired themselves a hot nurse to wash between their age-spotted ass cracks? Well, I wasn’t about to become the equivalent of Eliezer’s hot nurse.

  “I wish you luck with all that,” I told Eliezer, pulling Anna back from the side of the platform in the same motion. “Definitely sounds like you could use a friend. But I’m not the one you’re looking for.”

  There was nothing remotely human about Eliezer’s laugh. It was like having God himself laugh in your face—or maybe Satan.

  “Friend? You truly do know nothing,” Eliezer said, chuckling darkly. “I will ask you one final time, Eric. Do you wish to walk the Eternal Dao?”

  A lesser man might have screamed. Hell, that’s what the animalistic part of me wanted to do—to run shrieking off this crazy platform in space, and let the chips fall where they may. Everything else: Anna, my date, the so-called real world I’d just come from, they felt small and insignificant next to the strange power emanating from this elderly man and his strange universe.

  Yet I mastered myself. I pulled Anna back from the brink, setting her on her feet in the center of the platform.

  A different part of my brain kicked in, but it wasn’t the rational one. It was the part that had every kid imagining himself as Superman, or Spider-Man, or any number of other superheroes with awesome powers. What if Eliezer’s bargain didn’t carry some hidden cost? What if he was just a lonely old man who wanted someone with whom to share his power?

  The rational part of my brain interjected. It said that I didn’t know anything about Eliezer, what he was offering, or what the terms of this bargain would be.

  Then, the thing the old man had been trying to tell me all along finally clicked.

  “I know nothing,” I said, meeting Eliezer’s gaze. His eyes were the piercing green of a jade statue, and more ancient than the Great Wall of China. “Which means I certainly don’t know the first thing about the Eternal Dao, Eliezer. How can I possibly know whether to answer you ‘yes’ or ‘no’ when I don’t really know a goddamn thing!”

  The last word echoed out into space. I expected Eliezer to blow his top at my insolence—instead, he clapped his hands together. The most unexpected expression spread across his wrinkled face: a smile.

  “Yes,” he said, sounding pleased. “Finally, you begin to grasp the enormity of the task before you, Eric. I knew I chose you for a reason…”

  Anna made a face. “Chose you? We chose to come to this tent!” From the look on her face, she’d begun having the same revelation I had about the nature of this ‘attraction’. We weren’t in some tent at the fairground any longer. “Who are you, old man?”

  He smiled beatifically. “I told you—I am the Peak Supreme God. And it’s clear to me now that I need to show you a few things if you are to make an informed decision about the Eternal Dao, Eric…”

  The platform gave a sickening lurch beneath us as the universe reeled. Galaxies revolved in my view, the stars turning from little pinpricks out in the distance to long, brilliant lines, like when Han Solo hits the hyperdrive on the Millennium Falcon. A great wind blew across my face, tossing back Anna’s ash-blonde locks as we shot through space like a bullet from God’s own gun.

  Finally, our view settled on Earth. We zoomed in further and further, diving through the atmosphere like a stealth fighter jet. Our view of the Western Hemisphere turned into a view of America, then the state and the city and the town in which Anna and I were currently having our date. By the time Eliezer was done with this crazy zoom, our platform floated over the top of the Chesterton County Fair, with our tent directly beneath our shadow.

  “The power of space is mine,” Eliezer said placidly. “And also of time. Witness, Eric!”

  As Eliezer spread his arms, the moon began to move through the sky like an old-school VHS on fast-forward. Only I realized after a moment that it wasn’t moving in the right direction—it was going backward.

  “Eric,” Anna yelped, grabbing hold of my arm and pointing. “Look!”

  Far beneath us, Anna and I walked backward out of Eliezer’s tent. We moved more rapidly than we had on the way here, our casual saunter turning into a backward power walk as we made our way down the thoroughfare. As I watched, we reached the parking lot and got back into my car, driving in reverse out into traffic.

  “This can’t be happening,” I muttered, shaking my head. “This isn’t possible…”

  “Along the path of the Eternal Dao, all things are possible,” Eliezer said like he was correcting a child. “We can do this even faster if you’d like!”

  Now time ran backward so quickly that the sun and moon hastened to change places. Anna and I stood there awestruck as workers broke down the fairground rides and dismantled tents, moving in reverse as the entire county fair rewound to a vacant lot.

  “Or even faster!” Eliezer roared, laughing now.

  The sun flashed in the sky like someone having a seizure. The ground beneath us rippled like an earthquake, but it was only the natural movement of Earth’s tectonic plates. We were moving back in time so quickly that I could see them—could see the formation of continents, the filling of the ocean, the ice age. Gradually a huge chunk of the planet formed itself into a meteor, which went hurtling into space as if the Earth were some massive catapult. There were a whole lot more dinosaurs running around after that left.

  “I hold your planet in the palm of my hand!” Eliezer yelled over the storm. “Were I to will it, I could make it so that humanity never for
med—that life never emerged from the oceans! Every great civilization, every mighty army of Earth, they are as dust before the Peak Supreme God!”

  The tape rolled back and back, like someone had checked existence out from a video store and they were going to get a fat fine if they didn’t rewind it all the way to the beginning. Stars winked out above our heads, the firmament retreating as the universe began to collapse around us.

  The Big Bang, I thought, looking around frantically. Eliezer’s going to let us see how everything started. He’s going to let us see God. Unless...is HE God?

  It seemed as good a guess as any. My ears roared like a choir of fallen angels as the universe collapsed around us, Eliezer pulling existence itself around our platform. It was a power beyond imagining, beyond mortal comprehension. As I witnessed what he could do, a sudden realization thudded through my bones, striking me to the core of my soul.

  I liked this power. I wanted it.

  All my life, I’d wondered what it would be like to actually have magical abilities. Every kid did. Except my desire never really went away. It just sat there, simmering in the back of my mind, rearing its head whenever the dullness of life sent my imagination wandering. And this power, what Eliezer wielded... It was something else entirely. And if he was offering it to me, to become like him? Who the hell was I to say no to that?

  As if he’d been waiting for me to think just that, Eliezer snapped his fingers. Within the span of a blink, we were back in the tent. What we’d taken for a platform in space had become a plush purple carpet, with matching walls of thick purple canvas blocking out the rest of the world. Tapestries hung from the walls, each adorned with images of the Peak Supreme God—Eliezer—in all his glory.

  “All this power can be yours,” Eliezer said, finishing his speech like a true showman. “All you have to do is take it, Eric. Make the first step.”

  Anna’s jaw hit the floor. She trembled like a leaf, clasping her face in both hands as she stared vacantly at the luxurious tent she’d found herself in.

  “I hate to bring out my crazy side as early as the second date,” she muttered, looking back at the tent flap, “but that was fucking wild. They didn’t put LSD in the drinks in the beer tent or something, did they?”

  I shook my head. It would’ve been a nice explanation, but… “I’m pretty sure that was all real,” I said, still staring at Eliezer.

  Anna nodded. “In that case,” she said, still looking a little pale, “I think you should definitely agree to walk this Immortal Dao thing.”

  “Eternal Dao,” Eliezer snapped, clearly irritated. “Women. They are a distraction along the path of the Eternal Dao, Eric. Better for you if you discard them.”

  For a moment, I just stared at the old man. Then I began to laugh.

  “Women are what makes a man’s life worth living,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest. “I’m surprised a being as old and powerful as you doesn’t know that, Eliezer.”

  He looked thoughtful. “Well, perhaps that’s why I need some new blood. Teach me things,” he muttered, though he looked like he still didn’t believe me. “So what shall it be, Eric? I’ve already given you more chances than you perhaps deserve. Will you walk the path of the Eternal Dao?”

  For just a second, I felt like I was back on that platform in space again. This time with my toes over the edge, about to fall off into the endless unknown. I gave Anna’s waist a squeeze, reminding myself she was there.

  “Yeah,” I said, nodding. If there was even a chance of me getting the kind of power Eliezer clearly had, I wanted to take it. “I’ll do it. Just tell me what I need to do. Do we need to blast off, or—”

  A staff materialized in the old man’s hands. A curved blade arced out from an indentation in the front, traced with the same rich purple as Eliezer’s robes.

  Without an instant’s hesitation, the old man struck out with a two-handed stab. The blade sunk into my side, struck a rib, then punched through. I felt cold steel exit my back.

  I dropped to my knees. Color drained out of the world as blood poured from the wound, Eliezer retracting the spear as easily as he’d struck. One quick blow, faster than a blink, and he’d killed me.

  I’m dead, I realized, staring down at the blood pouring from my chest. No way the hospital could stitch this shit up in time…

  “Eric!” Anna hit the ground beside me, trying in vain to keep me upright. “Oh my God, baby, oh my God!”

  “Yes?” Eliezer said smugly, arching an eyebrow.

  I sank to the ground, staining the old man’s fine carpet with my heart’s blood.

  Anna glared up at Eliezer. “You bastard! You murderous fucking bastard!”

  Eliezer let out a little scoff. He nudged me to the side with one slippered foot, clicking his tongue at the spreading stain on the floor. “That’ll never get out of the carpet,” he said ruefully, shaking his head.

  That’s funny, I thought, darkness encroaching on the edges of my vision. You’d think a god could clean the place by snapping his fingers or something…

  Strange, the shit you thought of when you were about to die.

  “Oh shit, hold on Eric!” Anna looked helplessly at the open flap of the tent. No revelers could be seen outside of it, though music from the nearby carousel played somewhat muffled through the tent’s canvas. “Somebody help us! Please—there’s been an accident!”

  “No accident,” Eliezer said gruffly, standing over me. “This is where we discover whether your Eric truly deserves to walk the Eternal Dao.”

  “Fuck your Dao!” Spittle flew from Anna’s lips, her nails digging into my shoulders as she stared Eliezer down. “I liked this guy, you asshole! I actually thought I’d found the right guy for once in my fucking life!”

  Eliezer began to chuckle. “Don’t look now,” he said, his long mustache bobbing, “but it appears young Eric may be about to pull through. He may live through this after all.”

  A deep, dark cold had settled through me while Anna and Eliezer spoke, almost like the grave itself. Then, something inside of me began to feel warm—intolerably warm. Sweat broke out on my forehead, the air around me going all stuffy like when the air conditioning broke in tenth grade and my teacher refused to open a window. Was this what passing over to the other side felt like? Like that?

  Just as the heat became intolerable, something inside of me shattered. It felt like my abdomen was an egg, and someone had just cracked the whole thing and poured the insides on a hot griddle. I writhed with pain, my feet beating a tattoo against the plush carpet. Anna tried to stop me, thinking I was having some kind of seizure, but she couldn’t prevent the transformation happening inside of me.

  A flood of energy left Eliezer’s fingers, rolling over me like an ocean wave. Golden glowing light saturated my body, soothing away the pain like a hit of morphine. The broken thing inside me vibrated to the energy’s strange resonance, sliding through multiple forms as I lay there on the floor. For a moment it rose like some kind of gas, then turned to liquid and flowed through my veins like molten gold. Finally, it solidified in my abdomen, radiating peace and health like the searchlight of a rescue boat picking up a shipwrecked sailor.

  I felt it disappear into me, retreating but not fully gone. Some inner knowledge told me that it was black, like that deep unknown I’d seen in Eliezer’s light show, and that it was a part of me now. Words flashed before my eyes, floating in the air like a projection:

  Eric has successfully created a Black Core (Dual Weapon Cultivation)

  I tried to sit up. My head swam, the world rocking around me. Anna’s hands gripped me tightly, the only thing that kept me from falling over. I grit my teeth, waiting for the feeling to pass.

  “Don’t move too fast,” she said, sounding like she didn’t fully believe her own words. “You’re hurt bad, Eric. I mean, you just got stabbed…”

  Stabbed might have been the wrong word. Impaled was probably more accurate.

  I had. Yet strangely, the nausea and the
dizziness seemed worse than the pain. Whatever that strange wave of energy did to me, it repaired my wounds. Which was nice, to be sure, but a little bit like apologizing for stealing by putting back the item you took in the first place. Eliezer caused this whole thing by impaling me.

  “What the hell did you do to me, old man?” I muttered, rubbing my chest. The fabric of my shirt lay torn and threadbare, a deep gouge where Eliezer’s blade pierced me. A similar tear split the fabric along my back, where the spear had stabbed all the way through my body. Where both wounds had been, the skin beneath now lay smooth and unbroken. No medicine, no matter how powerful or quickly delivered, could heal a wound like that.

  “I have shattered your dantian,” Eliezer said proudly.

  “My Dan what?” I asked, rubbing my forehead.

  Eliezer scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Typical youth. Most apprentices would take thirty years to achieve the feat you’ve performed! My Peak Comprehension of the Prime Elements of Time and Space have given you a great gift, young Eric.”

  “Doesn’t feel like a gift,” I muttered, the nausea retreating. I tested my footing against the carpet and found it good enough to stand. “Feels like you fucking impaled me.”

  “I did exactly that,” Eliezer said, without a hint of shame. “It was necessary to provoke the proper reaction within you. To think you performed such a feat within mere moments! Truly, I have found my proper beneficiary.”

  Anna stood up next to me, giving me a look like she couldn’t decide if I was a hero or a monster. I couldn’t blame her—hell, I wasn’t sure myself. What kind of power did Eliezer put inside me? The thought of it gave me pause.

  “I didn’t do anything,” I said, shaking off the remainder of my nausea. “You did this to me.”

  “Be glad I did,” Eliezer said with a shrug. “What I’ve given you today is a massive advantage, young man. For you to have formed a Black Core during the ritual—well, that is a surprise even the Peak Supreme God did not anticipate! You can be certain I don’t get surprised very often.”